the update 0709

figured it would be easier to just send a link as opposed to an email…

I know it’s time for this update, but how to present it to people other than myself… is a task. I have seen the Lord do SO much in the little amount of time (almost 23 weeks). I could talk about what He’s going to do, what He’s already done, what He’s done in me, what He’s done through me for others…  Instead.. I’m going to tell you what I’ve seen.

I’ve seen what it is to be uprooted from a place/people you’ve come to love and be asked to go to the last place on earth I wanted to be, San Diego. (although, I’m glad He did)  I’ve seen what it is to figuratively put your raft in the shallow water, be swept away into the rapids only to be dropped into the slow moving, nearly stagnant water, then back into the rapids…a continuing cycle. My walk with the Lord really took to the river the day I graduated from IWU. There’s something to be said about having no outward stability; being in a place of decision – to either spaz out and adapt a lifestyle of a compulsive worrier, or find strength in the secret place… of His presence. It took a 2 years to even understand a piece of what that meant. Since then, I’ve seen the hand of God provide in ways no human could ever provide; seen His favor fall in a way no man could ever organize; I’ve seen Him HEAR AND ACT with haste to change the situation. I’ve seen Him use the mess He brought me out of to comfort others; I’ve seen Him blow away the cloud confusion, over and over again. I’ve seen His faithfulness punch out the lies surrounding my situations. By now, you’re probably like.. “ok, that’s great, but what have you been doing?”

I’ve been waiting. Until the last 2 days. Work started July 1 as the new Sports Information Director/Asst Women’s soccer coach at San Diego Christian College. I learned of how much will be going on, and how important God having my time is going to be. I have finally been released to this walk into this ministry He showed me back in February. Just like He said back when I visited, all the signs on the sign post that were pointing in different directions will suddenly all align and show you the way in unison. That time’s come. Things are picking up in a great way. There’s much more to be seen – big steps coming. That’s the extent of my update. Not the usual description of a day/week/months you were probably expecting, but as you’ve seen I don’t fit into molds very well.

So basically once things start truckin’ for real… you’ll hear from me again.. :)

Picture of Your Love

317 returns

It’s been over 6 months since I’ve received a call from an anonymous 317 number. I was sitting in starbucks, doing some work and my phone rang. the 6 month string was broken. I figured it had to be important because I didn’t just give my number out to the world..infact.. like no one. Maybe that’s why I never get any phone calls haha. Anyways, these past weeks have been a roller coaster- mostly me internally battling God’s request to be still and rest. It is my biggest weakness. So, my pathetic effort to be at rest, I was working. But back to the phone call. Upon hitting send, I heard my name exclaimed from the other side of the phone… and I didn’t recognize the voice until she told me. It was a woman from where I worked back in Indianapolis (when I was actually employed). *flash back* She’d been in a really hard place and turned to alcohol, when she came back into our area in cubicle land, about half way through my time there. She has the best heart… so funny.. but still in hard place..

The last time I saw her, I wrote her a little thing and paired it with a CD of worship music. Why? I don’t know.. just felt like it was fitting for the occassion. I was leaving, she was staying.. why not throw some straight God at people before I wasn’t there to do it again. Kind of the final hurah. It had been heavy on me to do something for the specified individuals.. . feb 08. Spirit of God fell in that place, upon her that day… its always great when the mention of what Jesus is to you, it begins a flow of story about what Jesus used to mean to people.. and they don’t even know how they got to where they are now. That’s what happened that day. A salvation and baptism flooded back after near 35 years. The assumption that it was “too late” was destroyed..hope restored. I didn’t hold on to it too long because I was ushered into the next thing fairly quickly. I thought the vividness of that day, I would never forget.. her face/words/the point for change that day.

Until today when it again came flooding back to me in her voice. She began to tell me that she carried the note around to this day, was listening to the CD, and hasn’t had a drink since that Februrary day. PRAISE GOD! She’d found the picture of her baptism when she first came to the Lord, paired it with Romans 8:28 -

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

She was sitting in the parking lot of her church, waiting for the retreat seminars to begin. She dove into God. I didn’t recognize her voice because she literally wasn’t the same. In her words, “I’ve found so much peace..” I teared up because the woman I saw before me in Feb 08 was so far from peace. She parted with an “I love you, I just needed to say thank you.”

It’s not often God allows you to see the fruit of your obedience… but when He does, OH MY GOSH – THANK HIM FOR IT.

kim tripped

slumdog mill and Jesus

just finished watching slumdog millionare… and didn’t really know what to expect. the reviews were all over the place from the people i know. “it’s good.” “sad” “inspiring” “i fell asleep” “i didn’t care for it” “the chick was hot”… obviously descriptive, not. so i sat down with an open mind. not just to the movie itself, but to what could possibly be the direction Ed Noble would go on sunday with the kick off of God at the Movies at Journey Community Church.

I’m not the biggest fan of chick flicks, but this was a whole new definition to knight in shining armor. one that i can totally roll with. not because its dramatic or anything gross or morbid, but because you saw his devotion. it wasn’t stereotypical chick flick where the dude is chasing after the girl because his one night stand left him wishing it was lasting, or an arranged marriage that wasn’t to the “knight” or the damsel in distress’ liking… he knew her as a child, he fought for her, he returned for her, he volunteered his life for her, he worked for her, his mind was always on her, and deepest of all he waited for her.

Throughout the movie, he asked about her – even when a slumgirl, (a nobody to everyone else but him) from his youth was the last thing you’d expect to be on his mind when his life was in danger… but yet, she was. she was always on his mind. everything he did had her in mind. how to find her, how to see her, how to show her he was still waiting for her… I don’t know the direct quote, but he says he will wait for her at the train station at 5pm everyday until she comes. as this is coming out of my fingers, all I can see is the love story we have a chance to live with Jesus.

Check out the reversion. if you don’t see it now, try this…

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“but because you saw His undefiled devotion. it wasn’t stereotypical chick flick where the dude is chasing after the girl because his one night stand left him wishing it was lasting, or an arranged marriage that wasn’t to the “knight” or the damsel in distress’ liking… He knew her as a child, He fought for her, He volunteered his life for her, He worked for her, He returned for her, His mind was always on her, and deepest of all He waited for her.

Throughout the movie, He asked about her – even a “nobody” from his youth was the last thing you’d expect to be on His mind when His life was in danger… but yet, she was. she was always on His mind. everything He did had her in mind. how to find her, how to save her, how to show her He was still waiting for her… I don’t know the direct quote, but He says He will wait for her at the train station at 5pm everyday until she comes.

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Maybe that’s a little clearer with the verses linked – the most dominant theme i saw was the devotion in jamal for latika. the same pure devotion Jesus has for you, except i haven’t seen a movie made that depicts that emotional bond without the carnalized human aspect coming into the picture… distorting the incomparable and pure love… (it’s illustrated hugely in song of solomon). though most people read that book as a passionate love story between a man and a woman, some churches even see it as vulgar – it’s a passionate story of God’s love for His bride, the church.  the church isn’t just the corporate body… it’s YOU. He’s passionately in love with YOU.

that passionate love goes another direction..like when latika realizes/responds to jamal’s patient love for her by showing up at the train station, Jesus is ‘chillin at the station’ waiting for you to respond to that invitation to accept His love for you. trippy part is just like jamal, ‘before 5′, He is chasing after you, finding where He can meet you where you are…pursuing you to let you know that He is at the train station waiting for you… just waiting… till the day when you show up.

now thats value! innately we desire to be sought after… we desire to be waited for… because that says “you’re valued” like nothing else in this world…do we not realize that were starring in our very own, personally designed love story, with the Creator of the universe? where we are being sought after and waited for?

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its an abrupt ending because thats how the reality of His love for you is going to hit you. spiritual spontenaity… the proof that there is a living heart inside. //signsoflife//

new friends

these are my friends, super grover and super ernie. ernie is so happy to have grover back home… since kylepants ransomed him years ago. so he’s back and now they’re friends again! took this pic with my enV. pretty darn good job, enV! michaela is coming today. she’ll be on the sdcc team next year. very nice. 7v7 tourney at UCSD tomorrow – causing a flashback of weekend tourneys from club days. 7:30-6pm. loooonnng day. but with fun people – hopefully. hah. soccer sometimes brings the worst out of people; hopefully thats not the case here. first series of games I get to watch as a coach. kinda weird. although my has been body is happy! been doing more now that theres sun out all the time. there should be pictures that accompany the next blog. pray for my external hard drive… he decided to stop working.. and it contains my photographic life in full. sad times with no money and the inability to buy dvd’s… now im thinking “did i have the dough to do it…” rats. o well. its allll good :)

soccer at the rock has been the saving grace. God’s given mad opps to play… which is the answer to january/february’s prayer of soccer for free since i AINT GOT NO CHEESE. so thank you, Lord. comin’ thru big time since LAFitness BLOWS a big one out here. I’ve learned too many times how to get screwed by company’s by getting screwed. thankfully the Lords allowed me to learn from mistakes – being too weak when i should have been forceful. grr. ATT, LA Fitness, the junk yard where i left keith, car guys, apartment people, airlines, refunds, applecare, insurance, your mom… you name it, i’ve prolly lost money to it ONCE. worst feeling – walking away knowing you just got taken. blarg.//that annoying dalmation, who’s blind brother drowned in the pool apparently a while back… WILL NOT SHUT UP.

anyways i dont even know where that came from. almost time to skedaddle off to the school… roam the city…  be awesome. the usual.

stand

1 Peter 5:9 (NLT)

Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith. Remember that your Christian brothers and sisters all over the world are going through the same kind of suffering you are.

weekend highlight

a life changing revelation

dumping out my wallet leaves me staring at evidence of my identity on the floor. license. credit card. debit card. school id. health insurance card. car insurance. fitness club membership. library card. AAA card…my initial thought is, “the only thing that makes them identity is my name..it’s just my name, big whoop.”

these days, people can do a lot with just your name. praise it, defame it, abuse it, steal it…  your name is a big deal.

in the real world, when someone steals your identity, they take it without you knowing it. …intending to strip it of its integrity, value and uniqueness. if they’re successful, it becomes a lifeless “it”. No distinguishing characteristics. Nothing more than a limp form in the perpetrators hands, ready to receive the breath of counterfeit. that breath deceives the rest of the world.. they’ll never know who you were or who you were created by.

ever thought about what identity theft looks like spiritually? Hauntingly similar, with a kicker.

isaiah 43:1 But now, O Jacob, listen to the Lord who created you.
O Israel, the one who formed you says,
“Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.
I have called you by name; you are mine.

He not only formed you, He ransomed you (The price or payment demanded or paid for such release), and called you by name. your OWN name. “by name“, to me, says ‘your name’ distinguished you from the others..(+personality and stuff that makes you, you- He designed that too.). why would He give you your own name, then make you like someone else? <insert snowflake analogy for cheese point>  psalm 139 says He knit us together in our mother’s womb, with a future and a hope! knitting is a pretty intricately detailed/time consuming process last time i checked. David didn’t say He put us together like papier-mache – all sloppy and random, while saying “whatever happens happens.” there was a ton of thought that went into this! i’m thinkin God wouldn’t have spent so long and planned so far ahead for your life if He didn’t have any expectations for you.

He actually has plans of prosperity for me? yep, that’s what He said. but what becomes of the original path of prosperity He designed for your identity is no longer found in Him, but forefeited to what you do, who you love, or to your past? say hello to spiritual identity theft.

hello spiritual identity theft. when he (the devil) steals your spiritual identity,  he takes it without you knowing it. …intending to strip it of its integrity, value and uniqueness. It becomes a lifeless “it”. No distinguishing characteristics. Nothing more than a limp form in the perpetrators hands, ready to receive the breath of counterfeit. that breath deceives the rest of the world from ever knowing who you were, even Who created you.

sound familiar? welcome to the enemy’s plan of attack. paul tells us to not be ignorant of the devils schemes. it’s what he does. he masks himself things that absorb your time, thoughts, life…

SIT (spiritual identity theft) has a low jack, unlike ‘real world’ identity theft. prayer :) God’s all about us having no other gods before Him… if we ask Him what’s up with our identity – He’ll be more than faithful to point out identity thieves :)

easter09